Death, Life and Immortality
by Sakamoto Mizuki
Summary: Presenting Xelloss "sore wa himitsu desu!" Metallium, the lecturer! Topic Of The Day: Death, Life, and Immortality. Who could be a better expert?


Death, Life and Immortality  
  
Hello boys and girls!   
  
My name is Xelloss.   
  
Is my last name really Metallium?   
  
Sore wa himitsu desu!   
  
*giggles*   
  
Oh this is great fun already, ne?   
  
Today is a lecture about Death, Life and Immortality.   
  
Deep subjects, ne?  
  
Let's get started, shall we?   
  
Death. As opposed to what many think, Death is our friend. Can you repeat after me? Death is our friend.   
  
Very good, boys and girls!   
  
Some look upon Death as a bad thing, but you know already Death is our friend. Now the reason why.   
  
It's mercy. Quick, like a single stroke. It's simple. It's good.   
  
Let me elaborate.   
  
Ah, let's see. Lina Inverse. Have you heard of her, boys and girls? Yes?   
  
Lina Inverse was a special person. Very special, rumoured to be the Lord of Nightmare's Knight. A delicious   
little morsel of Chaos! Now let's see, she wanted to die of all things, that was her greatest desire. And   
she was my friend as well. And do you know what friends do for friends? We grant their wishes and we try to   
make them happy! So what did I do? I killed her. She was so happy she kissed me before she died. Wasn't   
that nice of her?  
  
So what is Death, boys and girls?   
  
Death is our friend! Very good!   
  
Now let's go onto Life.   
  
Life. Many think it's a good thing, but what do you think I think of Life? I think it can go and kiss   
Ceipheed's holier-than-thou ass! It's Hell and some people hate it so much that they kill themselves.   
Life is an enemy, remember that.   
  
Can you repeat after me? Life is an enemy.   
  
Very good!   
  
Now why.   
  
Life is an enemy because people come into it, but they don't always stay. Most would rather be sleeping   
than living. Now put down another note, Death is like sleep only you never wake up. Life is Hell and you   
hurt in it. You're always hurt; you're always scarred; you're always injured. Life is pain and terror   
and fear and all those nasty things.   
  
Let's go into that deeper, shall we?   
  
Well, since we already started with Lina Inverse, let's continue with her! She hated Life and she wanted   
to die. She had been living a long time, which wasn't her choice, and she was tired of being hurt and of   
pain, so I killed her! But she didn't really die. You see, I made her a Mazoku like me! It was fun, killing   
her and then reincarnating her as a Mazoku. I remade her and I gave her Life. But mine was a different kind;   
it was Immortality.  
  
Let's go over Life.   
  
What is it?   
  
Life is our enemy! Good, boys and girls!  
  
Immortality is our last subject. Immortality is overrated. Living forever is fun in its own way, watching all   
your enemies die and knowing you'll survive to torture their children and their children's children and making   
sure that their children's children's children will never /have/ children! You get to watch everyone and gloat   
that you are still living! But then, Immortality can also make you go insane. Yes, insanity is a symptom of   
Immortality, but that's fun too! You get to see stuff that no one else sees and your mind is unique! No one   
else has that other than you and you get to show that off! Immortality also gets in the way of Death, since you   
have no mercy.   
  
Now why Immortality is overrated. Mercy will never show itself to you if you have Immortality. But you can remedy   
that by showing no mercy to other people! That's fun too!  
  
Since Lina Inverse is our example for this lecture, we'll continue. Lina-chan became a Mazoku like me and she   
became immortal as well! She's living forever, but a different kind of immortality. Since she was human and   
immortal, she felt pain and hurt and fear. But as a Mazoku she doesn't feel those things anymore! Well, she does   
sometimes, but she likes it! She gets to inflict it on other people and it makes her feel better now.   
  
So what is Immortality?   
  
Overrated! Great boys and girls! That's the end of our lecture! Bye bye!   
  
Xelloss...  
  
Yes, Lina-chan?   
  
I don't exactly like you using me as your examples. *glares*  
  
Aw, but Lina-chan! You were perfect for them! I'll make it up to you... *nuzzles*  
  
...Fine, I'll go get the handcuffs and whipped cream. *feline grin*  



End file.
